Do we have to go to the library AGAIN?

It's that time of year: summer. The dreaded summer word. What is there to do when the sky is overcast, the temperature unseemly cold and a drizzle of rain keeps slipping down your neck when you go out?

In an effort to tear the kids away from the television and computer, Simone offered to take them out to the library.

"What for?" complained one. "My favourite show is on." This was said while the kid's eyes remained glued to the computer screen in order not to miss a second of the game she was playing.

"I don't want to read," said the other.

"ABC," yelled the third.

"Readopoly," Simone reminded them all. "You know, the summer reading game that they have at the library? You can win free books!"

"You're gonna make us go every day," whined the kids.

"Nah," said Simone. "Just today."

Two grumpy faces and one smiling one. "ABC!" the two year old gleefully said.

At least one of the kids likes reading...

Il est 5 heures du matin...

et le coeur de Simone est sens-dessus-dessous... C'est une véritable zone de guerre chez elle. Le garçon de 13 ans est amoureux d'une fille qui habite à 2 heures de route et, comme il veut se rapprocher d'elle, fait son possible pour se faire virer de chez lui. Il ment, il vole, et il insulte les gens autour de lui qui ne cherchent qu'à l'aider...

Simone soupire. La vie n'est franchement pas facile des fois...

Wonderland!

No, no. In spite of writing novels in the fantasy genre, Simone has not finally slipped into a fantasy world where all's well that ends well. No. Yesterday, the 13 year old decided to go to Canada's Wonderland, an amusement park, with a couple of his buddies. This entailed procuring a ride there (from Simone) and back (from a buddy's parents).

The morning of the event, the 13 year old was, to put it bluntly, full of vinegar and the other unmentionable. He bounced off the walls, decided he needed to buy two bottles of Gatorade from the local store to bring with him, refused to have breakfast and claimed there was not enough room in his backpack for a lunch. He asked belligerent questions that made little sense, argued and generally made a nuisance of himself.

Simone, shortly before walking the 11 year old to school, told the 13 year old that he was welcome to find other transportation to his event: she wasn't going to drive him. She got the stroller, the 2 year old and the dog and headed out the door.

"Are you serious?" the 13 year old chased after her, his face a mask of wounded disbelief.

"Yes," Simone told him. "I'm very serious. If you can't be nice, I don't have to be nice to you."

This stumped the 13 year old. He considered Simone's words. "Okay," he said soberly. "I'm going to clean up my room and have breakfast and make a lunch. Maybe we can go then?"

Simone sighed. "Yeah. Maybe we can go."

Il fait chaud!

Et voilà! Mine de rien, l'été est arrivé! La température a grimpé jusqu'à 35 Celsius hier... Du coup, Bébé B ne veut plus sortir. C'est comme en hiver sauf que Simone ne gèle qu'à l'intérieur. En effet, elle sort dehors, loin de l'air climatisé, pour se réchauffer. Mais Bébé B n'a pas envie de sortir. Pas pour la piscine, pas pour le Coin des petits, pas pour la bibliothèque, pas pour un biscuit à l'épicerie... Il veut rester bien au frais dans son petit coin. Surtout depuis que le toboggan lui a brulé les fesses - enfin, pas vraiment brulé, mais le plastique était définitivement très chaud. Simone croit savoir comment régler le problème: la plage! En tout cas, ça vaut la peine d'essayer. Aujourd'hui, opération on saute à l'eau!

Grade 8 Graduation!

Last evening was the 13 year old's graduation. Preparations around the house involved going to a second hand store to buy a last minute suit because the young teen had, in his infinite wisdom, trashed a perfectly good pair of dress pants bought only two months prior. Grandma, being a wonderful Grandma, bought the suit and dress socks. She ironed the suit and the shirt and hemmed the pants and, bless her for this one, harried the 13 year old into the shower.

The boy took the day off school to "get ready". He showered 30 minutes before supper, had supper and got dressed in 10 minutes. That was it. Voilà! The boy was as ready as ready gets. And unlike the many, many, MANY days he dawdled to get to school, leaving well after the first bell had sounded, he was chomping at the bit to get there in time.

The rest of the family got ready while he was away, the sitter arrived for the youngest of the clan, everyone got into the cars to head to the school and poof! An hour later, the 13 year old was in possession of his Grade School diploma. Can't beat that - unless they made the school chairs more comfortable to sit in...

Simone a mal au...

Trois jours comme ça, ça promet! Trois jours de nausée et de colique - et non, Simone n'est pas enceinte.

Il fallait bien s'y attendre, pourtant. Le chien a été malade - Simone a accusé le chien d'avoir mangé des saletés. Plausible. Le bébé a été malade. Simone a accusé le chien: le bébé a bu de l'eau dans le bol du chien.

Et puis l'horreur. Simone changeait la couche du bébé et le chien, qui se mèle toujours à tout, a voulu lécher les fesses de l'enfant. Le bébé, qui jusque là hurlait, s'est arrêté brusquement et s'est mis à rire. Tout fier, le chien a léché le nez de Simone, histoire de dire, "Tu vois? Tout est bien qui finit bien!"

Et oui... sauf que maintenant, c'est au tour à Simone de faire la course aux toilettes. Car tout le monde est guérit sauf elle!

Wanna be my friend?

The sun shone bright, the heat turned up and Baby B was out and about, minding his own business in the backyard when Simone spotted... another little boy in the yard behind theirs.

"Baby B!" she called. "Look! Do you see who's over there?"

Baby B, being shorter than Simone for the time being on account of not being 6 years old yet, could not see what Simone could. From his point of view, he could see a fence. He therefore continued on his merry way, picking up the dog's stick and pitching it three feet in front of him for the dog to chase. And yes, the dog DID chase it, going past the stick then back again to pick it up.

"There's a little boy in that backyard," Simone insisted, pointing.

Baby B gave Simone a look that said, "Yeah, nice try, Mom." Then he pitched the stick at Simone. Fortunately she was 4 feet away so he missed.

The other little boy came up to the fence and peeked through.

"There he is," Simone cried excitedly, racing for her camera.

When she returned, Baby B and Eliot the dog had decided to investigate. The three "kids" then started a game of tickle tickle through the fence.

"Arden!" A voice called from the other house.

The little boy stopped playing and glanced back at his house.

"Arden! Lunchtime!" Sighing, the little boy popped his thumb out of his mouth.

"Bye Arden," said Simone.

Arden and Baby B stared at one another through the fence for a moment longer then Arden raced back toward his house.

"I think you've made a friend, Baby B," said Simone.

And without a single word being spoken between the two protagonists...

Mal aux fesses...

C'est terrible... Simone n'en finit plus de demander au petit de la pardonner. Il a les fesses toutes rouges et, bien sur, maintenant il a la colique. Ce qui fait que Simone se trouve obligée, au risque sinon d'aggraver le problème, de changer la couche du plus petit presqu'une fois par heure.

Soupir...

Pourvu qu'il guérisse rapidement!

Is he STILL asleep???

Eliot the dog was trying to be a good dog. He really was. But the thing is, Simone had not moved from her spot on the couch for hours. On her lap, Baby B rested, his skin feverish and his eyes closed in sleep.

Eliot had to go. In fact, it was past "had to go" time but he knew there'd be trouble if he did his business in the house. He went up to Simone and licked her feet hopefully. She giggled and tucked her feet under her, juggling a little to keep Baby B's head steady.

Eliot licked Simone's right hand (it was closer). In the process, he licked a couple of keys on her laptop. They tasted yummy but when he leaned forward for further tongue investigation, Simone raised her hand in warning. Eliot backed off the laptop and resumed licking the back of Simone's hand.

"I can't take you out right now, Eliot," Simone told the dog. "Baby B is sleeping and he's feeling sick. When he wakes up, I'll take you for a walk."

Eliot sat back and cocked his head from side to side, as though he were pondering the meaning of Simone's little speech. He approched Baby B again and sniffed him. Eliot nudged his buddy a little but got no response.

"See? He's sick," Simone repeated.

Eliot expelled a breath, sending his jowls quivering. He rolled his eyes a little as he did this and sank down into a sitting then lying position.

And it was such a beautiful, sunny day...

M'man! J'suis fatig...

Ce ne fut pourtant pas une journée trop chargée...

Quelques emplettes tôt le matin après une promenade avec le chien... Le déjeuner et quelques éclaboussements dans la piscine... une sortie au parc en après-midi...

Pourtant, arrivé l'heure d'aller à l'école chercher l'enfant de 11 ans, Bébé B n'en pouvait plus. Il hurlait parce qu'il ne voulait pas quitter la maison. Il hurlait parce qu'il ne voulait pas rentrer dans la voiture. Il hurlait... au fait, pourquoi hurlait-il?

Il hurlait parce qu'il n'avait pas sa balle. Il hurlait dans le corridor de l'école et les mamans qui passaient par là assuraient Simone qu'elles aussi avaient vécu de tel moments avec leurs enfants.

"Pourquoi il fait ça?" demanda un p'tit gars à sa maman en désignant la boule hurlante de Bébé B, allongé sur un tapis à l'entrée de l'école.

"J'en sais rien," répondit sa mère. "Mais toi aussi tu faisais la même chose à son age!"

Au moins, Simone était rassurée que ce genre de comportement était normal.

De retour à la maison, Papa alluma la télé pour Bébé B et il se calma assez pour avaler son souper. Lorsque ce fut l'heure du souper pour le reste de la famille, Bébé B sortit sur la terrasse avec tout son petit monde. À peine que Simone fut assise à table que le petit grimpait sur ses genoux.

"Nan-Nan!" fit-il.

Simone caressa ses cheveux et tenta tant bien que mal de manger son repas avec le petit énergumène sur elle. À mi-chemin, Simone se rendit compte que... l'enfant dormait!

C'est fatiguant les journées avec Maman...

Ce qu'elle est VILAINE la maman!!!

Hier ce fut la scène en A majeur...

Simone voulait aller voir le spectacle de la fille de 11 ans mais elle savait qu'elle serait accompagnée de Bébé B. Naturellement, elle ne s'attendait pas à TOUT voir. Il ne faut pas trop en demander d'un petit de presque 3 ans. Elle s'attendait par contre à pouvoir voir le petit rôle de sa fille qui allait être sur scène à la fin du spectacle.

Bébé B ne voulait rien savoir. Simone a eu beau lui donner des jouets à volonté, du jus et une promesse formelle que s'il coopérait, elle l'emmènerait jouer au parc, Bébé B s'est précipité vers la porte de sortie et s'est mis à hurler.

Contre mauvaise fortune... Simone l'a donc embarqué dans la voiture et s'est immédiatement dirigé vers un parc.

"Parc! Parc!" s'est écrié le petit, bien excité.

"Tu as raison," approuva Simone. "C'est un parc. Mais comme tu ne t'es pas bien comporté, tu n'iras pas au parc aujourd'hui."

Elle est sorti du stationnement et s'est dirigé vers un deuxième parc. Le petit s'est mis à hurler. De toute évidence, il ne voulait pas quitter le parc. Simone a arrêté la voiture au deuxième parc.

"Parc! Parc!" a dit Bébé B.

"Tu as raison," approuva Simone. "C'est un parc. Mais comme tu ne t'es pas bien comporté, tu n'iras pas au parc aujourd'hui."

Les hurlements s'affaiblissèrent rapidement. Lorsque Simone s'arrêta devant un troisième parc, Bébé B ne dit rien.

"Tu as vu?" insista Simone. "Qu'est-ce que c'est?"

"Parc," répondit le pauvre petit bonhomme.

"Tu as raison," approuva Simone. "C'est un parc. Mais comme tu ne t'es pas bien comporté, tu n'iras pas au parc aujourd'hui."

Elle marqua une pause. "La prochaine fois que je te demande de bien te comporter pendant quelques minutes, est-ce que tu vas m'écouter?"

A poopy weekend

No, the weather was actually lovely this weekend. Lots of sun during the day, a dash of warmth, a sprinkling of rain to cool things off in the evenings... Perfect weather for Simone.

No, the poopy part came in because Eliot the dog had the runs. The poor thing is now on such a restricted diet in an effort to reduce or eliminate the problem that he's begun staring at the marigolds with drool dripping from his snout...

But that's neither here nor there. The facts are thus: on Saturday at 3 am, Simone's mother-in-law woke Simone up to let her know that the dog was scratching like mad at the door. Turns out Eliot needed a walk on account of having the runs. Same thing on Sunday at 6 am. Simone was beginning to think that the dog might just love living on a farm, far, far away from 3 or 6 in the morning on the weekend.

For crying out loud.

Then Simone's niece dropped by for a visit. Simone had come in from grocery shopping, had tenants visiting the basement and groceries to put away. Oh, and the dog needed a walk but she thought that might wait for a few minutes. Shortly after her arrival, Simone realized that the baby's diaper needed changing (for the third time that morning - apparently he suffered from the Eliot disease too). Simone's niece stood watching as Simone wrestled the little guy to the floor.

"He's got a poopy diaper," Simone informed her niece.

Simone's niece shrugged. "I don't mind," she said.

So Simone proceeded to change the aforementioned poopy bum. Just as she was finishing up the job, her niece started shrieking. Simone examined the baby's butt but found no cause for the screeching.

"The dog!" shrieked Simone's niece. "Ew! He's pooped on the floor! Ew! He's doing it again!"

Sigh.

And we're not even going to get into the baby peeing on Simone.

No. We are not going there.

Le petit pot?

Finalement, il faisait assez chaud pour s'installer dehors. Assez chaud, ça veut dire que Bébé B pouvait se promener confortablement sans culotte et sans couche. Car oui le jour était arrivé. Il était grand temps de redire bonjour à Monsieur le Petit Pot.

Simone eu tout de suite l'impression qu'elle avait manqué son coup. Bébé B grimpa sur le petit pot et, debout, essaya de danser.

"Ah non!" protesta-t-elle. "Ce n'est pas pour danser. Il faut s'asseoir dessus."

Le petit malin s'assit sur le petit pot... avec le couvercle bel et bien fermé.

"Ah non!" dit Simone. "Il faut ouvrir le couvercle."

Bébé B se leva et se mit immédiatement à faire pipi. Par terre. C'était rigolo, de toute évidence, car il se mit à se marrer.

"Ah non!" dit Simone. "Il faut faire pipi dans le petit pot!"

Bébé B s'enfuit et refusa de revenir au petit pot. Mais, histoire de se marrer d'avantage, il s'arrêtait de courir toutes les 20 secondes pour voir si son tuyau d'arrosage fonctionnait encore. Et plus tard, il refusait de porter sa couche.

L'été sera long à ce rythme là...

Hey, Simone! Angry with your dog?

Walking the dog has improved tremendously over the last few months but difficult moments do pop up. For instance, the dog is still given to pulling on his leash, causing Simone's neck to snap back and making her head look as though it belongs on a bobblehead toy. Simone purchased a haltie to smooth away such moments and so far, it seems to have worked.

However. When Eliot spots another dog, barking ensues. And jumping. And tugging at the leash. "Let me at 'em! Let me at 'em!" Eliot seems to be saying. Simone then uses her martial arts training to tackle the dog and hold him on the ground. Yesterday, while walking back from the school where she'd dropped off the 11 year old, Eliot spotted a beautiful labrador walking with its owner.

"Bark! Bark!" Jump, jump. Tackle. "Drop it!" and it was over.

Simone, the dog and the stroller with Baby B in it continued on their merry way. When they had travelled about 100 feet, Simone heard someone calling her name. She stopped, looked around and spotted one of her favourite friends behind teh wheel of a van.

"Hi!" shouted Simone.

"Looks like you were pretty mad at your dog earlier," remarked the friend. "Looks like you were choking him."

Oh boy. Simone wondered whether she'd also noticed the dozen dog treats she'd invested in Eliot since returning from the school...

"Well, have fun!" shouted Simone' s friend.

Simone waited for the SPCA to visit her but they never did. Perhaps tomorrow...

Naaaaan! Viens jouer!

Bébé B ne voulait pas sortir. Il aurait bien aimé aller au parc mais la pluie avait innondé le sable et Simone a refusé d'y aller. Du coup, boudeur, Bébé B a à son tour refusé d'aller au Coin des petits. Il ne voulait pas sortir du tout. Il voulait jouer avec son train et ses livres et il voulait que Simone reste tout près de lui.

Simone en a profité pour lire un livre.

"Naaaan!" s'exclama le p'tit roi. "Jouer!"

Simone qui s'endormait avant d'avoir recourt à son livre s'étonna mais se rapprocha de Bébé B. Du coup, il se mit à jouer avec un nouveau jouet. Simone reprit sa lecture.

"Naaaaan!" s'exclama à nouveau Bébé B. "Jouer!"

"Non mais," protesta-t-elle. "Je lis moi!"

"Jouer!" insista-t-il.

Mais encore une fois, dès qu'elle se rapprocha, Bébé B s'éloigna.

Du coup, Simone se remit à lire, cette fois-ci en cachant le livre. L'après-midi se passa à merveille après tout - suffisait d'être discrète!

What's that word again?

One of Baby B's favourite websites is starfall.com. It's an awesome site with everything for kids learning their alphabet and learning to read.

As a result of playing the games on the site, Baby B has learned that "when vowels go a walkin', the first one does the talkin'." This helped him to spell and say words such as "goat", "boat", "team", "meat" and "maid". No guff. No tricks were involved in taking the pictures: the kid can spell.

Of course, he doesn't know how to spell "made" yet but Simone believes that'll come in time...

Trop à faire? Ne faites rien du tout!

Au programme dimanche dernier: un allez-retour à Toronto, un voyage à l'autre bout de la ville (2x allez-retour pour déposer et ramasser un enfant quoi voulait aller voir une amie), une promenade en vue d'aider les enfants qui souffrent de la maladie de Tourette et un tournoi de rame. Mis à part le premier voyage, Simone souffrait d'ennui à cause de la pluie et, bon, d'accord... de paresse extrème.

Du coup, elle a passé l'après-midi à jouer dans la cuisine avec Bébé B.

Bon, y-a pas d'quoi être fière...

Driver Error

Some days, the only error resides in owning a driver's license and operating a motorized vehicle capable of sitting more than one person.

Yesterday, Simone packed up baby, mother-in-law and the dog. They drove across town to pick up the 17 year old. After a successful pick-up, late by a mere minute (the 17 year old was late, not Simone), Simone drove a little further and dropped her mother-in-law a half hour early for her 4 pm appointment. She then proceeded to the 11 year old's school, arriving in time to see the last of the busses leave the property.

They then went to the 11 year old's singing lessons and, after dropping off the kid, Simone's cell phone rang. Sighing, she checked the display. Her mother-in-law was calling. "I made a mistake," she said. "My appointment was for 1:30 pm, not 4 pm, so I missed it. Can you come and pick me up?"

Simone said she could.

"I need to be dropped off at home," the 17 year old pointed out. "I need to get ready for my graduation."

So Simone dropped the 17 year old off then drove across town again to pick up her mother-in-law. They negotiated the 4:30 pm traffic and made it almost in time to pick up the 11 year old. Baby was fast asleep and snoring by this time. The dog, however, needed to use the facilities. Simone had to walk him around the area while Baby B screamed incoherently because he'd woken up when the car door slammed shut and Mom had disappeared from his line of vision.

The business having been concluded, Simone and dog hopped back into the car and everyone went home.

The question is.... who was in the car at this point?

Ils m'ont fait pleuré!!!

Simone est arrivée à l'heure. Par contre, elle a oublié d'apporter sa boite de Kleenex. Peu importe, se dit-elle. Ils ne vont pas m'avoir avec la même histoire cette année.

Elle savait d'avance que les élèves de 12ème année allaient recevoir une bougie qu'ils devraient alors donner aux élèves de 11ème année. C'est un geste symbolique qui signifie que les plus ainés de l'école quittent et que c'est à leurs cadets de devenir leaders à leur tour. Très bien, Simone a réussi à ne pas pleurer.

Par contre, elle ne s'attendait pas à cette présentation PowerPoint... Des photos de bébés s'effaçaient pour faire place aux visages presque adultes des jeunes dont la graduation du niveau secondaire prendrait place le lendemain. Les élèves présents ricanaient et s'amusaient énormément mais Simone, elle, pleurait à flot. Quelle misère. Et pas une boite de Kleenex en vue!

La prochaine fois, Simone ne pleurera pas, nah!

Mais elle apportera une boite de Kleenex au cas où...

Graduation Countdown

Mr Loveshotpeppers (along with his beautiful girlfriend)will be graduating from high school tomorrow evening. Armed with a brand new suit and a brain fairly bursting with knowledge, he is ready to conquer the world. This morning, his school hosts a special mass in honour of the graduates to be. Tomorrow, a milestone will be reached. Sigh... but hurrah!

Qui aimerait faire un pique-nique aujourd'hui?

Le soleil se lève et Simone a déjà tout préparé. Il y a un grand pique-nique d'organisé aujourd'hui et Bébé B et invité. Il y aura un tas d'autres petits chenapans dans un des parcs du voisinage. Ça risque d'être très amusant.

D'ailleurs, Bébé B se réveille près de 2 heures plus tôt que d'habitude, tellement il doit être excité... ça promet!

Reste à savoir si son meilleur ami, son chien, est invité lui aussi...

The Heat Is On

No, it's not what you think. Summer has not arrived. Or at least, it has not stayed. The heat is back on inside the house. By common consensus, it was decided that the house felt too darn cold. There was no warming up anymore. The fact that stepping outside required the use of a thick winter jacket to ward off the cold wind should given Simone a huge hint but she was eternally hopeful that things would warm up.

They didn't.

Now it's June and the warm air is blasting through the vents and Simone's cold feet are warming up slightly.

And to think that they're suffering from heatwaves in Europe...