Dog Troubles

Eliot, the German Shepherd, stretches out on the front carpet, depressed. Simone has told him he's a bad dog with stunning regularity today.

Eliot begged to go into the backyard. The sun shone bright on the newly fallen snow, creating a glare and a semblance of warmth. Eliot bounded out into the snowbank just past the deck and swam through the snow until he left enough of a hole to do his business in.

Then he proceeded to engage in one of his favourite hobbies. He gnawed tentatively. Pulled a little. Then he yanked decisively. The branch came apart from the tree with a satisfying crack.

"Eliot!" Simone yelled, sliding the patio door open abruptly. "Get in here. You're a bad dog!"
Eliot gave up on the branch and reluctantly slunk back toward the house. Just before going through the doors, he gave the branch a glance. That moment's inattention cost him a tap on the head.

"Bad dog," said Simone again.

Eliot managed to stay out of trouble for a bit of time. Simone even petted his head once or twice. He was beginning to come out of his funk when he realized that Simone and Baby B were about to leave the house. Since the leash came out of the closet, Eliot realized happily that he would be joining them today, instead of being relegated to the laundry room.

They stopped in front of the 13 year old's school. Five 13 year old boys, all but one of them huge, headed toward the car. Eliot bounced from the front to the back nervously.

"Bad dog," snarled Simone, aiming an elbow at Eliot's chest to prevent him from jumping into the front seat again.

The 13 year olds jostled for position, found seats and barely complained save for when Eliot leaned heavily on particularly delicate body parts.

"Bad dog," said Baby B when Eliot tried to retreat away from the teens and only the baby's car seat.

Simone decided to leave Eliot in the laundry room when she drove out to take the 13 year olds from the retirement home where they were completing a social studies assignment back to school. The car ride was spectacularly quiet.

Not so when Simone got home.

Eliot had spilled his water dish over. He pulled out pots and pans and he'd found some cardboard to chew up.

"Bad dog," said Simone.

Eliot slunk away. A dog's life can be so tough...