Happy Birthday, Joey (he hates the paparazzi)!Simone Maroney learned a valuable lesson: if the cost of the meal is less than $10 per person for a buffet, chances are the food will be... less than quality. Perhaps there are exceptions to this rule but last Sunday, when she helped her stepson celebrate 13 years of wreaking havoc on an unsuspecting world, Simone ate a lot of junk. Really, who would marinate pasta salad in beer anyhow? A fellow diner suggested that perhaps the kitchen ran out of vodka.
Simone imagined the scene all too well.
The two cooks banter back and forth in the kitchen.
"Hey," says Cook A. "We're out of vodka for the pasta salad!"
"That's because you drank the rest of the bottle last night, you alkie!"
"Give me this," Cook A tears the beer bottle out of Cook B's hands.
"What the devil? I wasn't finished drinking that, you know?"
Cook A pours the remains of the beer into the pasta salad. "You don't need it. You already drank 10 of them. Consider this a donation to the restaurant patrons. If they eat our food, they need all the booze they can get their hands on!"
Simone did not eat her pasta salad after having tasted it, for the record.
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